One Day At A Time

I know I have been MIA for the bulk of 2020/202, Covid and 2 personal deaths back to back... and maybe this type of post is not typically favored or even remotely thought of for a business, but I am an artist before the business and that is a blessing and curse. We feel deeply and some could even say weird, but weirdness is what makes me. Your weirdness makes you - neither are wrong, both are needed.

So… this is about mental health and how extremely important it is to me.

I know the holiday season can be extremely difficult for many. Some of us would just like to skip right over them and ignore everything that resembles them.

Globally we are all living through, not only the overall continued effects of the pandemic, but also with other personal grief, particularly the pain that comes from losing a loved one from covid or not.

There are also those who may be grieving another way such as: the outcast, the black sheep, being on the spectrum, trauma, those with addictions, PTSD, depression or any other mental health disorders diagnosed or not. The list is long and unwelcomed by many or by all. It really doesn't matter where it stems from, when you feel alone or in those dark places it is emotionally debilitating and it can rob you of pieces of your life.

You must hold on. No matter what.

I have lost loved ones to challenges on this list, I want you to know that these are only names or labels created to define behavior in society. It is not what defines you as the person you truly are. It is not that you are crazy, unstable or anything else. It means you are human.

You are loved even when you think you aren't. The voice in your head that tells you otherwise is an asshole and a very well known liar. Always remember that.

You are not alone, even though many times it feels as if you are. And you may respond after reading this as I have at times when I look around a room or my life.. Yes I am alone… so I wanted to break the statement down..

When I or anyone says you are not alone…it is because there are others that know your pain, are going through it or have gone through it. It just seems like no one else is nor could they ever understand, but we do.

You are an energy uniquely yours, that fits perfectly in this universe and is beyond needed.

When you feel lost in your grief, sadness, disappointments, panic, frozen, self sabotaging, or a racing mind...“that space”... it is difficult to find your strength, hope and that light.

You must remember it is temporary, regardless of whatever situation it is. It is always temporary. You can make it through anything but you have to get to that spot where you believe that. Shutdown any other thoughts that contradict you feeling anything but good about yourself.

So, for today try to remember that this stranger is thinking of you, I feel you, I know it hurts. Know that I am sending you positive energy, prayers, a rain dance, even a cartwheel if needed (though I may hurt myself, it’s ok). I am hoping that you will feel my faith in you and your faith in yourself.

I am not saying it's easy, it's not.

I know because I have been there, but I can tell you that I have worked hard to get to where I am and I still have a ways to go and believe with all my heart that you can too no matter how long it takes. One day at a time. One minute at a time.

You are amazing, regardless of the circumstances, or people around you so please do not allow them to break you.

We are also spectators in each other's life works. Let's remember we have different views on this metaphoric life. Remember to have empathy for each other, look at situations reflectively, and help others get to the place where they feel whole again.

If you are ahead of someone and you look back…extend your hand and help them.

No one is perfect

No perfect marriages

No white picket fences with 2.5 children and a dog, or car, or number of vacations.

Whatever standards may have existed for the so-called perfect life comes from an outdated economic standpoint, it shouldn't be a gauge today for our personal happiness.

Social media is saturated with an illusion of what or how you should look like. More botox, fillers, filters, perfectly smooth skin, multiple layers of makeup, lighting adjustments, and never aging faces. But, there are no filters when real life stumbles on your door, and a perfect selfie smile just isn't going to cut it.

Maybe the thought of marriage makes you nauseous, but you would love a yellow-polka- dotted fence, five cats and a bunch of staycations - and that is awesome because it's you. GO! Go Enjoy the hell out of that yellow-polka-dotted fence! Or a bikini whatever.

You are enough, you are perfectly beautiful with every scar seen and unseen. Point blank.

Mistakes are the markers for being closer to getting it right, and downfalls are our strongest mentors. They do not make you a failure no matter what anyone says. If you make a mistake it will eventually become a lesson bringing us into our best self!

Sometimes getting to what we are working so hard for takes time-and that's ok. Everything cannot be done yesterday.

So to end my very first rambling post, I shall end with this:

One day at a time

Your minute, not mine

One foot in front of the other.

Walk past the naysayers, especially when they want to hover.

Avoid the negative chit-chatters

Because you are working on yourself, for yourself, and that's ALL that matters.

Do not let the holiday season or any other day throw you into a black hole, it's just a season.

I hope this blog not only inspires your heart and your will, but also gives you a quick peek at who I am, how I can authentically ramble, or stay quiet for months, how much I pray this world will become a more inclusive and an empathetic place.

You got this. Do not give up. Do not believe that this world would be better off without you… I promise you, it won't be!!!!! I will say it again: This world would not be better without you.

Wishing you countless possibilities and a spark in your heart.

JV

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